Moms and Vets: a little rant about people who complain about Mothers Day
Another year and yet again more op-eds published with the somehow still surprising revelation that not everyone is/has/wants to be a picture perfect mother. I don't understand why this is still news--why is it important to say again and again how no one is/has/wants to be June Cleaver? Feels like "asked and answered."
But consider another minor holiday dedicated to a group of people who sometimes endure harrowing experiences: Veterans Day. Imagine these op-ed perspectives talking about how Veterans Day is so painful because:
- I wanted to be a veteran, but couldn't due to health reasons.
- I thought I wanted to be a veteran, but it wasn't what I expected and now I regret it.
- I don't want to be a veteran.
- Some veterans do terrible things.
- Some veterans are lazy.
- There aren't any veterans in my family.
- There are veterans in my family, and some of them are not very good people.
- I know some veterans who makes a really big deal out of Veterans Day, but it's exhausting for me.
- I didn't have the experience I wanted in the service. I thought I was going to punch Nazis, but instead I rode a desk in Georgia.
- I had a really harrowing experience in the service and I feel like Veterans Day is hollow compared to what I went through.
- If we really wanted to celebrate veterans, we'd give them better health care, including mental health care, instead of just having a minor holiday.
The last one is true about vets and mothers, but it doesn't preclude having a day to remember them.* None of the above are excuses to not appreciate moms or vets doing the best they can, whether or not they are us, whether or not they are in our family. If Mothers Day bends you out of sorts, you can take a break from it--it's a minor holiday that no one gets off on a weekend. Or maybe we can just say "thank you for your service."
*Maybe with the yearly reminder, we can open conversations about the ways society can better support them. Just not the same conversations over and over.
Comments